Mission Statement

Update:

16 November 2012 9:00 AM New Mexico USA

Good morning friends,

Lots of progress and productivity again, every day, redefining what is most important to me and what really matters in this lifetime; the legacy I'm wanting, perhaps needing to leave behind (besides the one I already have, am, or might be leaving...)

It's just time... time for a revision of my own 'Mission Statement,' like in Jerry Maguire. :)

Planning and adjusting one step at a time.

I invite you to consider what you want and what you need while knowing what you already have.

For any Jerry Maguire film buffs, or Cameron Crowe junkies, I've provided a link to good ole Jerry's actual mission statement. I'm going to be sipping my morning cup of Joe, and take a look at this myself, I mean really take a look, and see what one of the "Greats," Cameron Crowe had written that did not make it to the actual final cut of the film (it's quite long...)

Always wishing you, my audience all the greatest and best...

Professional career restoration at the forefront, as long as my mental (and physical) health remains intact, I'll keep up with some now-and-then Porcelain Utopia blog & website rebuilding (remember back from April/May 2012 with the full database corruption?) About 500 posts still to restore, I've simply removed about 100 posts last night that were not as relevant to what Porcelain Utopia has come to be today, a much more welcoming and inspirational environment. Not simply every single aspect of my art, the more "erotic" posts, and the like, removed, even though such a genre is technically my trade if you can believe that! Just another side of me, a talent (perhaps? LOL!) but I'm looking to really get down to the fact that I'll be turning 37 and with 10 years sobriety in mid-January 2013. I ask, "What next?"

I used to have an intact network and the right people/connections in place, in Hollywood and New York, but not the material itself (scripts, novels, etc.) I was still quite young and when schizophrenia/schizoaffective disorder knocked everything out of place from 2006 to just about a year ago (maybe less) I put together Porcelain Utopia, did my music therapy albums on iTunes, podcasting, and with about 10 books and film scripts under my belt, one had been produced on premium cable for 2 seasons (uncredited as I was in the hospital at the time and Hollywood had "beaten me" so-to-speak)... some television pilots, a few short films and stories with minor achievements, as I kept trying to resurface mentally.

I'm doing my best now to focus on one thing at a time (as I said) and so to restore my network, now that I now have some very worthy material: writing, for example, narrowed down to 4 or 5 pieces.

I'm about to begin yet another journey.

The material wealth which allows me and my current family to live day by day, from that software patent I sometimes bring up which helped such companies as Amazon and Wal-Mart do what they do today. I was only 15 years old at the time, and sure it was a brilliant idea, implementing what would play a large part of the online shopping experience we still enjoy and utilize today. My proceeds then invested in the initial public offering of Google stock, which I still own today, just that my family still doesn't trust me with such a large amount of money. They took it over and there's simply nothing I can do about it. So I'm revising my mission.

Hey I was a kid then. I am still a kid in many ways, yet perhaps I'm unintentionally not allowing that part of my soul to shine outwards, but definitely internally, so here I come.

Keep up with more updates not necessarily posted on this blog itself on Porcelain Utopia related Facebook pages. I'll always be around, and often happy to interact, if I am not busy (which is rare) or enjoying personal time.

http://www.facebook.com/porcelainutopiablog

http://www.facebook.com/schizophreniaraw 

http://www.facebook.com/jwharnisch

*On my personal Facebook page, let's agree, we can always feel free to hide or un-friend if things are not mutually friendly, but I pretty much post similar material on each of these pages overall.

Jerry's Mission Statement:

http://www.sportshollywood.com/missionstatement.html

Sincerely,

Jonathan Harnisch

 

Applied Metacognition: The Best Day of My Life

Today [again] is the Best Day of my Life—

Plain & Simple

Was it yours? 

http://www.thebestdayofyourlife.org/ 

(New JH site in the works...)

The day began with my Tweet from 

http://www.twitter.com/jwharnisch

that read with an LOL:

"Today is the best day of my life. It just happens to stink"

I described to my therapist how I, once again turned the negativity around 100% to complete positivity. I have discovered through him that the process or the  'medical term' which describes the way I made it from hell and back over the course of 24 hours might be referred to as Meta-Cognition or simply metacognition: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metacognition

"Knowing about knowing"

Domino's Pizza and a movie with my terrific new friend from town in celebration of  the day!

In the meantime, NAMI [the National Alliance on Mental Illness] http://www.nami.org has now endorsed (if that's the right word?) both  Porcelain Utopia and The Real Me podcast. It brought in a few million hits within an hour basically.

Wow! Wow! Wow!

Only other update as I am very short on time with company arriving any minute: I received an "urgent" call from my General Practitioner (Primary Doctor) as soon as my blood work-up results came back, and testing, which I have done every few months due to the face that I am technically Diabetic though I have lost 85 of the 100 pounds I had gained, and since "reversed" my blood levels, yet, what could be any more urgent than the fact that I have too much of... 100% pure filtered distilled water in my system (thus washing out the sodium levels in my system)--so they are of course suggesting that I stop drinking as much water as I do.

10 years ago, it was alcohol, LSD, and crack cocaine, then caffeine, and now... only water! The doctor actually advised (and she is one of the highest rated in the state) that I actually add more Hot Pockets (junk food) and Slim Jims to my diet for the time being.

So I have an addiction and thus have overdosed on... water!

It's too bad there are no “WA” (Waters Anonymous) meetings I can attend. Huh?

This is THE BEST WORST NEWS I have ever heard about my health!

Today is [by far] the Best Day of My Life!

Again, is it yours?

Good evening (or day) to all of you!

 

 

Putting the Laugh On Crazy

Happiness is not created as a result of certain conditions. Certain conditions are created as a result of happiness.

My emotions took over my senses and led me to a condition, or state, having had a solid few weeks there, and yet now re-emerging to state of, again, Peaceful Mind; but the Voices of Paranoia struck, and at first I had been, well, not aware, until I “caught myself” not being mindful, or present.

The Voices of Paranoia as I call them have come back and they had haunted me most of the morning. To Tweet some Narration of the Voices, and to Tweet or post here and there, some oblique words, last night I simply tweeted “Conan.” I was watching Conan, and enjoying it. But I enjoyed the oblique, randomness, flight of ideas and with no pressure that I lose any “following” of The Often Mysterious and ‘Out There’ Jonathan Harnisch. It seems to be helping my process of always-becoming authentic, more and more, testing things out, starting over and over, and apologizing, saying thank you; suffering and returning, on repeat-repeat.

I hope I’ll decide to keep this up. To post whatever I am feeling or hearing or random words I think or hear (real or unreal) without carrying a notepad, setting up the header and signature images, tagging (that one I’ve already been basically done with, as people will find whatever it is when they might, or not, tags or without the minor hassle). Even a blog post, or the setting up the microphone and settings for The Real Me podcast; my attempt is to let that go and do as I wish. If my desk is messy I won’t fix it. If my desk is messy and it bothers me, then I will.

All the rest will follow and unfold, as it should. I might read a book and enjoy it because I am “ready” for it, in my life. Other times, not. I’ve done lot. The need to expand and create more and more with specific plans and goals, and things; as for today, right now, I am letting that go. No harm. Being with Self, Being Self, I still hear the voices, right this moment, about 3 of them, but I’m putting the “Laugh out Loud” on ‘Crazy’ and rolling with the tide, the Process of Schizophrenia, recovered, not cured.

Hope: I have the hope. Always had it. Will never lose it. And I have my good days and my bad days, and I mess up; often, I mess up. I make amends. I catch myself when I can, and I move on. Through the loss, all the loss, the stigma, and the effects of corruption from others who had once been a part of my life, and that incudes a lot of people… People I have forgiven, and nearly forgotten. I’ve succeeded in letting a lot go. A lot. My life used to be filled with literal grandiosity and bigger than life events, relationships, and settings, conditions, and things that my current life no longer includes.

I have since been asked to speak, to perform, to do interviews. Today I received an invitation from an investor who somehow found me and seems willing to put a few million dollars back into my film production company, which went out of business in 2010. I have turned down all of these offers, graciously, as I’m just not at a point in my life where I feel ready or willing to accept. And I haven’t rejected these invitations altogether, I’ve asked for rain checks so as to not burn bridges that might benefit my well-being later on, if that time comes when it might.

I leave this post as-is; stream of thought. Unedited. Not even read over because this is how I feel right now, and I am creatively expressing my ideas and thoughts with no intention, no goals, no expectations. Being myself (yes, as the voice tells me that I suck and need to die.) I’m on top of it. So there are a lot of people who are perhaps ignorant, full of stigma, and those who are just selfish (yet I know myself enough that I am the most selfish person I know, to be honest with you, and it makes me feel good to publically acknowledge that.) I don’t think I am a bad person (yet sometimes I do). This is it. This is the raw me. Stripped down. It’s just me, writing out my feelings and thoughts, ‘just because’.

At the same time, if I do receive notice that I might have offended anybody or done something inappropriate, I will adjust accordingly. It is often the case when I am symptomatic, which I am right now, that I do not realize that what I might do or say is inappropriate. So until then, I think I am self aware of my symptoms and myself, but I cannot honestly say that I know that, realistically, when in a basically mini psychotic experience (like now). I experience things in a completely different way than I would when not symptomatic or as a person who is not mentally ill (as I am). Even my worldview, my entire belief system can be changed even for just an hour with my having no innate way of knowing this. I mean, it would be pretty hard to change one’s entire belief system.

So, to those of you in my immediate surroundings who do “mediate my reality,” most definitely let me know if I am behaving perhaps inappropriately. I don’t think that I am. But see? My thinking is what is diseased. All I believe I am doing is losing fear as I express myself, and publically so as to offer, if anything, insight into my experiences with schizophrenia. I am paranoid, perhaps delusional. But I have my tools and resources, and all I want to do it share my experiences at the moment in order to both come to better terms with myself and state of mind, and while I am at it, to allow others, perhaps in here, in my mind as much as I can so the very people I love: my audience, might see themselves through, well, seeing me, in a way. We’re not alone. Nobody is.

If you can understand a politician, then you can understand what a perhaps ignorant, or whatever, way some people just are.

So that’s about it. Off I go, and Twitter… who knows. I’m just going to roll with this roller coaster and see how it turns out.

Laugh out Loud on “Crazy,” I say, ‘Yes, indeed!’

Jonathan Harnisch

Giving Up To Be Happy

• 
  

  Would you give up your need to always be right in order to be happy?

  
  


• 
  

  Would you give up your need for control in order to be happy?

  
  


• 
  

  Would you give up on blame in order to be happy?

  
  


• 
  

  Would you give up your self-defeating talk in order to be happy?

  
  


• 
  

  Would you give up your limiting beliefs in order to be happy?

  
  


• 
  

  Would you give up complaining in order to be happy?

  
  


• 
  

  Would you give up the luxury of criticism in order to be happy?

  
  


• 
  

  Would you give up your need to impress others in order to be happy?

  
  


• 
  

  Would you give up your resistance to change in order to be happy?

  
  


• 
  

  Would you give up labels in order to be happy?

  
  


• 
  

  Would you give up your on your fears in order to be happy?

  
  


• 
  

  Would you give up your excuses in order to be happy?

  
  


• 
  

  Would you give up the past in order to be happy?

  
  


• 
  

  Would you give up attachment in order to be happy?

  
  


• 
  

  Would you give up living your life to other people’s expectations in order to be happy?

  
  
  Upon publication, Porcelain Utopia reader Keith wrote what I believe should be included in this particular post:
  
  

  Would you give up your desire for peace in order to experience the peace you already have?

  
  

Feel free to keep writing in, adding suggestions to the list; questions and/or answers/experiences.

Jonathan Harnisch

To The Victor Go The Spoils

From My Personal Notebooks: [May 1, 2012]

The Delusional Thinking Process

To The Victor Go The Spoils: In the old days of war, the winning army pretty much got to loot the countryside and take what they wanted—wealth, harvest, women, whatever. Those would be the spoils of victory. In a relatively civilized setting, we use it more symbolically or metaphorically. The winner (victor, the victorious one, the one who gets the victory) gets whatever benefits go with the actual winning of the title, prize, award, office, or event. They could be formal or informal--that is, they could be a designated part of the prize (a gold medal, a contract with an athletic equipment manufacturer) or just tag along with it (celebrity status, free gifts, media attention, boost in their love life).

Dear Readers,

Not to focus on the illness of schizophrenia when I don’t need to, but noting some things I learned as I came out of my latest episode of delusion and minor psychosis, with paranoia being the overarching element.

Early this morning, refreshed, and now out of any episodic states related to my illnesses. I’m now able to access what it was like, when yesterday I had blended back into this more normal life experience—in order to demystify what happened in my mind and why, and thus how to cope even better next time, and also so I can try to figure this whole darn craziness out. I’m always looking for answers, solutions, and understanding, the more I grow, and grow more comfortable with this illness, primarily schizophrenia.

While the paranoid and delusional beliefs, along with my awareness of them, are also present, I had done some thinking.

About delusions, hallucinations, and paranoia, then I’m going to start my day, meditate, have fun, and attend my psychologist’s appointment in a couple hours, maybe edit a bit of one of my upcoming novels, but stay off the computer for the most part, I hope, I hope!

Seems that hallucinations, delusions, and, in short, a psychotic feature I might label more simply:

• Black/White


• Good/Bad


• Good/Evil


• Devil/Jesus


• Antichrist/Christ

I think that I have had several categories and that one scenario will stand out yet many will actually overlap.

Whether it’s:

• Religious


• Grandiose/Celebrities


• Aliens/Conspiracy/End of the World—Doom

Some of my notes during my episode, and more as I was coming out of it through my coping tools, of which these days I have many. I’m discovering that my delusions are for the most part rooted in some grain of truth. This while in a way, my entire worldview, if mapped out—the processes and the storyline, I believe likely has a lot more so-called (in writing) of a back-story, and subtext, metaphors, and symbols. As a writer who knows about the craft, I think my knowledge helps me understand some of this schizophrenia material, because I’m finding, being perhaps slightly biased, a correlation between writing theory and practice, starting with the idea I am so fascinated with: story—in general.

Some kind of historical context (Jung’s theories play a large part)—

It's "to the victor go the spoils." The spoils of victory are the extra bonuses, perks, and treasure you get for winning.

In the old days of war, the winning army pretty much got to loot the countryside and take what they wanted—wealth, harvest, women, whatever. Those would be the spoils of victory. In a relatively civilized setting, we use it more symbolically or metaphorically. The winner (victor, the victorious one, the one who gets the victory) gets whatever benefits go with the actual winning of the title, prize, award, office, or event. They could be formal or informal--that is, they could be a designated part of the prize (a gold medal, a contract with an athletic equipment manufacturer) or just tag along with it (celebrity status, free gifts, media attention, boost in their love life).

Killers will kill for money and power.

Think of this: The other way around as our schizophrenic realities will often distort: “to the spoils go the victor.”

Thus let’s amp that up to a more grandiose context perhaps: War and global catastrophe.

People are out to get me (paranoia) for money, power and status. And I often believe that this is true.

Then the storyline, and maybe it’s because I am a writer, though I often will bring the story element out of my writing, warping time, and place, settings, characters, as in my film On the Bus, or some of my novels available online, and some still to be published traditionally.

Story, story, story. Schizophrenic Storyline, Delusional Thinking Process… Healing Process. Processes. I believe that is the root of it all. That the storylines for me—and I would think for most suffering with schizophrenic or psychotic disorders, or thought disorders—the storylines are personal, synchronistic and overlapping, symbols, mythology, and connections, even coincidences take on a very deep and again, personal meaning, a very deep and personal context.

Digging a bit deeper into the vulnerabilities of psychosis, again, now that I am not currently experiencing one, though my heightened, or metacognition often lets me know if and when I might be, but not always.

Symbolic stories. A tattoo of a cross that someone has might make me think that he (or she) is God—then I might confess my sins to a complete stranger, but if aware enough, these days I can usually keep that to myself, and believe wholeheartedly that yes, indeed, this person with the tattoo is God, no doubt, but I’ll just keep that secret to myself. This goes for any delusion, yet this will then leave me, and us, susceptible to actual theft or simply vulnerability since if and when something of ours, or mine, is taken, stolen, I am somehow really and truly wronged, no matter on to what extent, I often feel trapped with my secret of knowing this, “but have to pass it off as, “OK, this isn’t real…if that man is likely not God—the man with the cross tattoo, then no, my pack of cigarettes was not stolen.

Kind of frightening because if I saw my house burning down, I think I would likely see and believe it was real, and this particular symptom is a common one for me, but if it really was burning down, I would think I would likely not do a thing about it, especially while in fear and stress from the event that I am experiencing, real or not. The police would come and I’d be locked up for being schizophrenic, for making a fake 911 call, I’d be scared with overlapping reasons to be scared.

May we all remain centered.

Jonathan Harnisch

 

Work Hard and Be Nice To People

Work hard and be nice to people.

Jonathan Harnisch

The Paper Cut of the Past

Today we Live: the Paper Cut of the Past

Dedicated to my wonderful wife who lost her very young mother, forty-six years ago today. There's not a day that goes by that she doesn’t think of her and all she missed dying so young as she did.

Love,

Jonathan

<<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>Dear Friends</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>>,

The knowledge of <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>truth</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> shall indeed make us free. As many of us know, most <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>books</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> of a more spiritual nature, even religious material, teach us that, for one thing, it is not the one who makes the mistake who we must then endeavor to get even with, destroy, or simply not forgive. For me, it comes to the actual mistake—and the mistake, or so-called “wrong-dong” which must be eliminated. Now, as a schizophrenic, the word evil—good and evil, black and white, good and <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>bad</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>>—often is the way I <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>think</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>>, and even believe. <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>I am</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> recovering amazingly well, happy, grateful, and finally on the <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>right</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>medication</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> regimen that helps make all the difference. But back to “evil.” And now as I recover more and more, evil is having less and less <strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>meaning</strong>. Let’s just be straightforward, evil simply does not even exist, at least for me, and I hope you might find it in your heart, mentally ill or mentally stable, to see and believe that. I’ve certainly been through trauma, literally all my life. Many wounds, even unseen; never truly go away, they linger underneath. <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>I have</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> never witnessed a murder and <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>I have</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> not lost a young child to tragedy. Yet, we all have our own stories, and whether we are paraplegic, if we <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>suffer</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> from general <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>anxiety</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>>, or have a paper cut which stings like all hell, it’s all just as profound and hurtful, perhaps evil, perhaps in our psychotic minds it’s the work of the Devil, or the <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>CIA</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>>. It all hurts.

Evil has no history. I invite you to <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>think</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> about that as the idea came to me during a meditation just before sitting down to write this, almost like a voice, but not anything unusual. Nothing wrong. It’s reassuring for me to know that evil has never existed. These days I can say that for the first time in my life.

And <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>I am</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> most definitely not suggesting that illness, or tragedy of any sort is anything good. So please bear with me. Besides, I’m getting sleepy here; the <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>day</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> has been long and yet… good.

So no matter what the negations of yesterday, or yesteryear, or whenever <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>in the</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> past (or present) I believe it’s the affirmations we have for today, <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>right</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> now that make the difference (and trust me if you would, give it a shot.) Due to the the positivity which we <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>think</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>>, when we can (that is key, sometimes we simply just can’t <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>think</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> this way)—all the negativity <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>in the</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> past, all the evil, even if it takes time, years and years... it can disappear. It can go away. Maybe a memory, hopefully a good one remains. Our more hopeful, grateful and happy meditations, <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>thoughts</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>>, and feelings which turn into beliefs, if you give it time, our positive <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>thinking</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>in the</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> now, rises triumphantly over all the past, all that you had always wanted to just forget but never <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>thought</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> you’d get to that point. Things do pass. It takes patience sometimes, and dedicated work, self work; it takes the mechanism of Life itself in many cases, like mine.

As the negativity of the past disappears into its nothingness, its natural state, and we seek to hold onto the beauty, fun and enjoyment—our freedom, we thus behold beauty instead of ugliness. The sublime, the beauty unfolds with patience and it emerges. It gets stronger and stronger  for me, even while I joke and play around and am known to, for example beat <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>stigma</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> in some rather unconventional and controversial ways. But sometimes like <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>right</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> now in my own bliss, my own "euphoria," my "cat nip trip," see: <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>>http://www.<<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>jharnisch</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>>.com/cat-nip-trip/ </<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>>I end up perceiving the <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>truth</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> instead of the lies, the false. So beauty appears, and it is; now that which is true, and not delusional, for example (but perhaps) yet the beauty and bliss still does come into view. It stays. Overall, it remains, through my good an <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>bad</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> days, through my <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>anxiety</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> attacks, the pressure I still feel most days, now and then. But I stay resilient. I keep at it. And I stay <strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>, as <strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> as I can be, always doing my best, doing what I’ve got to do which makes me, not anybody else, feel some <strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>peace of mind</strong>—my number one goal in this Life. And at nearly 37 years old, it takes my breath away—all my usual joking and frustrations aside—that I sit here so many times in my sanctuary within the vibrant colors on the walls, sometimes-cluttered, this workspace with film reels and notes and old candy wrappers, I sit in silence and feel the peace. I feel fantastic.

So I ask myself where the false, the untrue, the lies, the so-called "evil"—where is it now that <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>truth</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> has essentially brought me a great deal of freedom? No matter if it never existed <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>in the</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> first place; that might have been a bit of a reach… Those old days are as though they had never been. "Similar, like... as if…" Not necessarily subscribing to the idea that all the negativity had never existed, because even that paper cut or that bumping of your head against the cabinet door, had surely been a <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>real</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>pain</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>in the</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> butt when it happened, isn't that the <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>truth</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>>?

Consider the <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>causes</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> having been neutralized, thus leaving little or no effect. The cause of the lies, the evil, the <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>bad</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>>… the past. Once we can stop brooding, weeping or dwelling on the negativity of the past, the shortcomings, failures, mistakes and evils of yesterday, or whenever it was, to steadfastly hold on tightly to the great Reality of today, <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>right</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> this second, no matter what else might be happening externally, in your life as in mine.

Together let’s walk within all the light and sunshine where all the darkness in not present, only joy and love. Forgiveness of the past itself.

These days, without a doubt, I know that every negative condition of the past is generally cleared away from my mind, my consciousness, and my beliefs, again, overall. I hardly even <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>think</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> about it, and if I do, I poke fun or <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>think</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> of it in a way that makes me feel good. I don’t believe any of that which was before has any effect whatsoever in my own Life <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>experience</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> now. Today, <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>right</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> now, I express, with self-<<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>acceptance</<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>>, a perfect Life. Right here and <<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong> class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'><strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>right</strong></<strong class='StrictlyAutoTagBold'>strong</strong>> now... it’s today that I Live and today we Live.

Sincerely,

Jonathan Harnisch

You Will Never Be Alone

If you make friends with yourself you will never be alone.

—Maxwell Maltz

Musically Enhanced Blog and Restoration Note 11-16-2012

Originally from from November 2, 2011

Restoration of Porcelain Utopia—Musically Enhanced Blog could not be restored. However an available link can be found here:

http://therealme.podbean.com/2011/10/28/episode-043-musically-enhanced-blog/

From 11-02-11:

Jonathan Harnisch of the Hip-Hop and Spoken Word mixed-up/maxed-out Band S&C [Schizophrenic & Caregiver], host of The Real Me podcast, also blogger of mental illness and New Age ideas and treatments, delivers a special totally mixed-up/maxed-out "musically enhanced" freestyle blog post, as he [of course, referring to Yours Truly] brainstorms live on tape, his coming up with the idea for a new book project, called "The Schizophrenic's Handbook," a long term undertaking—a guide—which will indeed reach even the most psychotic of us Schizophrenics with the intention of helping them, helping you, helping us—navigate through the storms and the sunshine—from daily living to the most frightening social situations. [Boy, that sure was a run-on sentence!] Until next time... Stay Real & Positive!

012 in brackets:

[My apologies if you were looking for the original Musically Enhanced Blog and it wouldn't show up. Here in November 2012, I'm still rebuilding the website since its full database corruption—offline for three months after it had been viral for the prior three months. Patience on my part, and I'm not editing these restored posts only marking them when they apply with their original dates. I'll hopefully get to post a current post about the rebuilding, restoring of Porcelain Utopia soon. Just focusing in one thing at a time, so far I'm 45% into its restoration, here on the 16th of November in 2012. Looking back on some of these posts has been quite an experience beginning in March 2011. Thank you all for your continued patience. -J. Harnisch]

Jonathan Harnisch

 

Smile

 

Never Give Up on the Things that Make You Smile!

 

Jonathan Harnisch



 

Never Stop Questioning

The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day. Never lose a holy curiosity.

—Albert Einstein

Boundaries in Reality

 

The mind can accept any boundary anywhere.

But the reality is that, by its very nature, existence cannot have any boundary, because what will be beyond the boundary—again another sky. That's why I'm saying skies upon skies are available for your flight. Don't be content easily. Those who remain content easily remain small: small are their joys, small are their ecstasies, small are their silences, small is their being. But there is no need! This smallness is your own imposition upon your freedom, upon your unlimited possibilities, upon your unlimited potential.

—Osho

Sincerely,

Jonathan Harnisch

On Giving

No-one has ever become poor by giving.

—Anne Frank

Jonathan Harnisch

Yesterday

Don't let yesterday use up too much of today.

Jonathan Harnisch

Love Quote

 

Jonathan Harnisch

Kindness

 





Jonathan Harnisch

Discipline

Discipline is making the choice between what you want now and what you want most.

 -Anonymous

Healthy Boredom

The Procrastination Lounge:

Healthy Boredom

Click Here for Audio Only [14 Minutes]

Google+/YouTube Feed:

http://www.youtube.com/user/PorcelainUtopia/feed

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vRhRtlt7emY]

The Real Me Podcast on iTunes:

http://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/real-me-jonathan-harnisch/id432451121

Jonathan Harnisch

Grace

012

Grace is a characteristic of the love of God [the Universe, the Source, or Spirit] that assists us in dissolving the ego’s world. Grace is a constant state, forever as it has always been. God [or your interpretation of God] forever loves His creations; even while our minds remain asleep He blankets us still. Regardless of the dreams we dream He forever holds us in His arms. And when we finally choose to awaken we will find ourselves in a place we have never left.

—You Have Chosen to Remember

Sending enlightenment your way; may your own journey be a blessed one, and filled with Love and Hope.

Recommended: http://www.facebook.com/jbcchosentoremember

Experience Meaning, Purpose and Peace of Mind With or Without Mental Illness

www.facebook.com/porcelainutopiablog

Jonathan Harnisch

www.facebook.com/pages/Jonathan-Harnisch/363757623712537

Zen and the A.D.D. Episode

Episode 088 - ZEN AND THE A.D.D. EPISODE

Lately on The Real Me Podcast Episode #88: "Zen and the A.D.D. Episode" available, gaining many hits as well as the most popular episode #89—the beloved Guided Meditation—see the popular Porcelain Utopia post http://www.jharnisch.com/invitation-meditation/ with the full transcript written out on http://www.jharnisch.com/meditation —

All podcast episodes are free on iTunes:

http://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/real-me-jonathan-harnisch/id432451121

Facebook: www.facebook.com/therealmepodcast

Jonathan Harnisch



 

 

 

Jonathan Harnisch

The Small Things

Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.

—Mother Teresa

Jonathan Harnisch